muSINGs

So, you asked me what memories I replay in my head all the time. I guess if you asked me this a couple months ago, I would be able to tell you exactly which memories play ceaselessly in my mind like a film without sound. It's funny how we may get some of the facts wrong, but we never get the emotions wrong. We always remember how we felt at that moment, whether it be sad, excited, touched, or loved. But now, if you ask me that question, I don't think I'd be able to give you an answer because I don't really look back anymore. Our pasts are our foundations, and they make up who we are, but the most important aspect of our pasts are the lessons they teach us. If you miss something that "used to be," then go find whatever you're looking for and make it something that "is." You can't change the past, but you can decide your future. There are definitely a lot of memories I miss, but I know that where I am right now is exactly where I want to be. Eventually, you come to a point where you realize that maybe the memories were the best you ever had, but it's not the particular elements you miss (be it the people, the situation, etc), but the melding of emotions, timing, and magic of the moment. That's what you miss. Even if the same elements were presented to you in the same fashion as you experienced it, you may not feel the same anymore. We're always changing, forever influenced by external factors that mold the way we perceive the world.
The only thing I can be sure of is love is constant. God is constant.
I think true love is a rare find. Not many find it, but you're lucky if you do. Or is it luck? Maybe it's fate, more positively known as destiny. To a certain extent, I believe destiny is just another excuse to be apathetic, because that's just fate, right? But I also think that there are a lot of things beyond our control.
Don't worry though, the Big Guy upstairs has it under control.