because

I need a getaway...because I need to refocus my life.

I need a new beginning...because I don't want to linger in the past.

I need to look forward...because I can't look back.

Because I've abnegated too much. Because this idea of normality is only an abstract one. because I used to think I had the acumen to think rationally, to CHOOSE rationally and not allow my heart to lead me astray. Because I have let this perennial problem lead to incorrigible resolutions. And then you allow yourself to think that things can be the same, though everything has changed, and nothing isn't an aberration of what it was. You try to hide it, to abate the frustration that has come out of this seemingly insurmountable situation, but in the end, your adroit plans reverse its power on you, and the joke is on you.